RobbUnfiltered Weekly NFL One-Liners: Week 5

Week 5: The first firing of the season falls. Which coach’s seat is now the hottest?

Arizona Cardinals (1-3-1) — They get that first win of the season and don’t be surprised is win number two comes against an Atlanta squad that lacks an identity.

Atlanta Falcons (1-4) — Dan Quinn has lost the locker room and might be the next head coach in the unemployment line.

Baltimore Ravens (3-2) — The Ravens bounce back after losing to the Browns and get to feast on the Bungals this week.

Buffalo Bills (4-1) — At some point, I’m going to have to admit I was wrong about this team—good thing I’m stubborn.

Carolina Panthers (3-2) — Cam who? This team belongs to Kyle Allen and Christian McCafffrey now—time for a trade.

Chicago Bears (3-2) — Khalil Mack had a chance to show Jon Gruden he made a mistake trading him—Gruden won this round.

Cincinnati Bengals (0-5) — This team might not win until December.

Cleveland Browns (2-3) — The Browns will always beat themselves until they don’t beat themselves…in other words, same old Browns.

Dallas Cowboys (3-2) — Dallas gets a JV squad in the Jets this week, which is much needed since Dak is struggling and Jason Garrett’s seat is getting hot.

Denver Broncos (1-4) — The Broncos break through and finally get that first win and have a realistic chance to begin a winning streak with a matchup against the Titans.

Detroit Lions (2-1-1) — The Lions had a bye week to prepare for the Packers and now we will see if this team is for real.

Green Bay Packers (4-1) — The Pack beat up on a Cowboys squad that was playing on a semi-short week while they had an extra three days rest and now they get a rested Lions team—I hate the way the NFL does its scheduling.

Houston Texans (3-2) — This is another team that I can’t figure out…that being said, they will probably be blown out this weekend by the Chiefs.

Indianapolis Colts (3-2) — You can’t help but root for this team that no one expected to be any good and all they did this week was hand the Chiefs their first loss.

Jacksonville Jaguars (2-3) — This match-up against the Saints had lost some of its luster with the Jags losing to the Panthers last week.

Kansas City Chiefs (4-1) — If you were wait to see if Patrick Mahomes was going to regress, well, you are seeing it.

Los Angeles Chargers (2-3) — Last week I said that the Chargers were garbage—this week, I am doubling down on that comment…they are overrated garbage.

Los Angeles Rams (3-2) — The Rams are not right in the running game and their opponents know it.

Miami Dolphins (0-4) — The Dolphins are no longer the worst team in the NFL—that honor goes to their opponent this week—if they were smart, they’d start Fitzmagic this week because he has had a field day against the Redskins in his career.

Minnesota Vikings (3-2) — The Vikings are between ok and good, not great and that is always going to be the narrative while Kirk Cousins is under center.

New England Patriots (5-0) — The Pats schedule is so fucking soft—next victim, the NY Giants.

New Orleans Saints (4-1) — I would have called you a liar if you told me that the Saints would be 4-1 at this point without Drew Brees.

New York Giants (2-3) — Back to reality for the NY Football Giants as they get to see the Pats on TNF.

New York Jets (0-4) — Sam Darnold comes back just in time to play a pissed off Dallas squad.  

Oakland Raiders (3-2) — I honestly thought the Raiders were going to be the worst team in football this year…there’s still time for that to come true.

Philadelphia Eagles (3-2) — All of the sudden the Eagles are back after they beat up on a Jets team that is horrible—pump the brakes.

Pittsburgh Steelers (1-4) — This is going to be a lost season for the Steelers and Mike Tomlin, who, if he is fired, should run as far away from the Redskins HC position as possible.

San Francisco 49ers (4-0) — The Niners seem to be for real and beating the Rams will solidify that.

Seattle Seahawks (4-1) — I never know what to expect from this team because they are not flashy or dominating and they are pretty much a faceless squad outside of Pete Carrol and Russ Wilson.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers (2-3) — Tampa can’t get out of its own way.

Tennessee Titans (2-3) — Jekyll & Hyde.

Washington Redskins (0-5) — Officially the most dysfunctional team in sports (Knicks owner James Dolan thanks you Dan Synder). If the Dolphins lose to the Redskins, then they are truly tanking.

Change.org Petition: Get Dan Snyder to sell the Washington Redskins

RobbUnfiltered is a sports podcast based out of Richmond, Va. Find me on Twitter @RobbUnfiltered. Email me at robbunfiltered@gmail.com.

This show is sponsored by On The Rox, Ponies & Pints, and Social 52, which are all located in Richmond, Va.

Sports. Life. Zero Fucks. #RobbUnfiltered

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